The dream of having a child often becomes the defining moment in a family’s life. For female couples, this desire is linked to a very special feeling. Both women want to be more than just parents on paper; they want to experience every moment of the creation of a new life, feeling a physical and spiritual connection with their future baby.
Just a few decades ago, one of the partners had to remain merely an observer. Today, reproductive medicine makes it possible to break down these barriers. The mutual IVF method for female couples, known worldwide as ROPA, enables both women to become the biological mothers of the same child.
The ROPA method: a bridge between two hearts
The acronym ROPA stands for ‘Reception of Partner’s Oocytes’. In clinics, this technology is often referred to as ‘shared motherhood’, because the parental roles are shared harmoniously and naturally.
One woman provides the child with her genetic material. Her egg forms the basis for new life, passing on character traits, physical appearance and family history to the baby.
The second woman receives the developed embryo into her body. She carries the baby for nine months, feels its first movements, gives birth and breastfeeds it.
In this sequence of events, there is no primary or secondary role. Each woman fulfils her own unique physiological and emotional role.
How a couple chooses their path
Deciding who will be the genetic mother and who will carry the baby always involves a dialogue based on trust. The couple discusses the medical aspects and their personal wishes with a fertility specialist.
Sometimes the decision is influenced by age or health. Egg quality changes over time, so genetic material is more often sourced from the younger partner. If one of the women has limitations regarding carrying a pregnancy to term, she is happy to contribute her genetic material, whilst her partner takes on the role of the gestational mother.
It also happens that one woman has dreamt of experiencing pregnancy and childbirth since childhood, whilst the other prefers to pass on her biological heritage to the child. The ROPA method allows these wishes to be perfectly combined.
Steps towards a new life
The journey of starting a family through mutual IVF is like a shared journey, where every step brings the couple closer to their long-awaited meeting.
First, the couple undergoes a detailed medical examination. The doctor assesses the genetic mother’s ovarian reserve and prepares the surrogate mother’s body for the upcoming pregnancy.
Next comes the selection of a sperm donor. The couple work together to review the sperm bank’s catalogues, choosing a genetic profile, physical characteristics and blood group.
This is followed by the stimulation and egg retrieval phase. The genetic mother undergoes a gentle course of preparation, after which the doctor retrieves the mature eggs. In the laboratory, embryologists fertilise them with donor sperm.
Once the embryo is ready, the crucial moment begins. The surrogate mother undergoes endometrial preparation, and the doctor carefully transfers the healthy embryo into her womb. From this moment, the nine-month journey of carrying the baby begins.
The miracle of epigenetics and the depth of the emotional bond
Very often, couples worry about whether the child will feel like their own to the surrogate mother if she shares no genetic similarity with the child. The answer lies in the modern science of epigenetics.
The baby does not develop in isolation. The surrogate mother’s amniotic fluid contains molecules that literally switch certain genes in the embryo’s DNA on or off. The surrogate mother does not merely provide nourishment for the foetus; she plays a part in shaping its health, immune system and physiology.
From the very first weeks, the baby hears the carrying mother’s heartbeat and responds to her voice. After birth, breastfeeding permanently cements this invisible bond. As a result, the child grows up united by a biochemical and emotional bond with both mothers.
The joy of equality
The core value of the ROPA method lies in absolute equality. In such a family, there are no questions about which of the mothers is closer to the child. One gave the child life at a cellular level; the other nurtured the child with her body and breath.
Many couples return to the clinic a few years later for a second child and swap roles. In this case, the first mother carries the child conceived from the second partner’s egg. This makes the family’s story even more harmonious.
Frequently asked questions
Is the ROPA method safe for the health of both partners?
Yes, the procedure is based on time-tested IVF protocols. Doctors monitor every stage of hormonal stimulation and uterine preparation to minimise potential risks for both women.
Who will the child take after?
The child inherits their genetic makeup from the genetic mother and the sperm donor. At the same time, epigenetic mechanisms allow the surrogate mother to influence the expression of these genes, whilst shared upbringing and habits make the child resemble both mothers.
How long does the whole process take?
It usually takes between two and four months from the first doctor’s appointment and diagnostic tests to the embryo transfer. This time is needed for examinations and to synchronise the cycles of both women.
Is it possible to swap roles when having a second child?
Yes, this is a common practice. The couple can use previously frozen embryos or undergo a new cycle in which the partners swap roles.
